Like a Warrior

There is a section in Master Shantideva's "Guide to entering the Way of the Bodhisattva" where he mentions that people have no problem with going out and working all day to make a living, and spending all their precious life's energy on gaining material things, but cannot seem to understand how to consistently practice the means of personal transformation.

In another section he mentions how some warriors can spend hours plotting revenge or some other attack, can revel in taking wounds and physical harm for the goal of harming another - but most of the time we cannot seem to revel in doing the things that would do us the most good.

When I contemplate my own personal daily practice today, I am struck by how easy it is to keep my commitments to my job, or appointments with massage clients. I am pretty good at making it to classes on time, or returning email messages. And yet, when it comes to sticking to my training - it's still a struggle sometimes.

When I think about the experience I've heard from most Westerners attempting to enter the Path of meditation (or any other practice for personal development of good qualities), the challenge I hear most is "how do I find the time?" and "how do I overcome laziness?".

For me, the answer is very clear, and it starts with another question: "how do you find time to go to work?" Somehow, most people are able to set aside 40 or more hours per week to go do things that don't necessarily contribute to anything but their bank account. Now - I understand that a full bank account is a very nice thing, don't get me wrong, but what does this REALLY contribute to your life?

If you think about it for a moment - did some of the people caught in the recent Tsunamis in Japan and Southeast Asia probably have full bank accounts? Yes. Did that help them at all? No.

If you save up plenty of money to buy a great computer, or car, or any of the things that we deem important in our culture, does that give you any guarantee that they cannot be stolen? Perhaps you insure them heavily - does this guarantee that some accident will not make you a quadripeligic, or take your sight so that you cannot use these beautiful things?

The point here is not to be dreadful or morose, the point is to question why we seem to find the time an energy to do things that we might not otherwise do for so many hours of the day/week/month/lifetime.

I think that the answer lies in motivation. We honestly believe that through paying with our time and effort, we'll get something that can ease the pain of this life, or give us some pleasure - even though all of those things will eventually wear out, or be torn away in an instant.

We also seem to make time for pleasure-seeking activities. I know for myself that it is very easy to schedule hours every week to watch a movie (ok, movieS). And yet it can still be difficult to invest the level of time i really WANT to invest in my personal practice.

And it all comes down to motivation. Movies are easy, personal practice is sometimes difficult. Going to work (usually) brings tangible benefits that are lauded by the culture. Personal practice, in the beginning, mostly gives me intangible things.

If I want to stick to my practice, I've got to become like a warrior. I have to begin to recognize that if I want to defeat my enemy - which for me is Ignorance, Laziness, Ill will toward others, and the like - then I am going to have to train.

I am going to have to train hard, because these particular enemies are just as strong or stronger than the usual ones we meet in the world. I am going to have to remember why I'm training too. I'm training for a very specific result. I'm training so that I can see my life become more and more beautiful. I'm training in order to have the presence of mind to help those who need my help. I'm training in order to have the patience to accept whatever comes without having to poison my body with anger. I'm training so that, just maybe, when the unexpected moment of death comes, I won't feel like I wasted my life.

These results are tangible and permanent. They cannot be washed away as easily as most of the things we deem important. These are the reasons to get on my mat today. To treat it as at least as important as keeping my appointments, feeding this body, and going to work. I have a great campaign to wage and everyday I must remember that I am a warrior.